Different Feeling

It feels so strange being away from Family and Friends that you have been around for 5 years. Now that I have move to another Duty location it is very different now having the kids around with me so used to hearing all the screaming from playing going on. Now I have a roommate which is cool, and we share two-bedroom town home. We pretty much do everything together from working out going to work and watching TV shows and Football games. He even also tries to help me out with fixing my truck which helps good for me cause of the cost the dealership would charge me.

Cost of being a Diabetic

Around a year ago I first learned that I might be a Diabetic but wasn’t giving actual proof at that time. I decided to see a different Doctor due to a co-worker stating that he was good. After my first visit he had looked the results from previous doctor he told me that I was Type II.  From what he saw from test I didn’t need medication since my sugar level was under a rating of 7. He stated to me that I needed to lose some weight for me to stay off medications. Since that time my weight has been up and down.  Towards the end of March, I was having pain and started taking over the counter pills to relieve the pain.  Second week of pain went to emergencies at the VA and the best they came up was that I may have hurt myself lifting weights.  The VA put me on inflammatory meds which did not help me.  Now I fall into my third week of pain and went to see my Doctor and by the symptoms he thought I had golfers’ elbow and he gave me pills and they didn’t work. Few days later I ended up at local hospital emergency and they couldn’t understand what I had.  They felt that yes it could be golfers’ elbow to and put me on meds which did help with the pain.  Made it to my fourth week of pain went back to my Doctor and finally he sent me to see an orthopedic.  The orthopedic arraigned for me to have an MRI which showed me having a torn muscle and possible blood from the swelling in my arm.  He then determined that surgery was needed and opened my arm up and found dead muscle tissue.  This muscle tissue turned out to be diabetic muscle infarction.  For any person out there having Diabetes please take it seriously.  The pain that you get from this dead tissue is more than anyone could bare.  Please read about this disease at http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1888747/.

Smelly Flight

It was kinda of strange riding on the plane yesterday. As I sat down this guy walked up to me and ask me if I had the window seat and I said yes. Guess he wanted that seat but I didn't move.  As he started to sit next to me I could smell the alcohol just reaping through his pores.  He also smelled as if he could have been on drugs too. The more I noticed he could have been a redneck from Mississippi. The longer he sat next to me the stronger the smell got. It got to a point I had to turn and face the window and try to sleep to avoid continuing to smell the scent from this guy.  Later during the flight I pulled out my Bible and started to read and he looked at me and that a good book to read.

Trust Trust and Trust

It's been hitting me pretty hard lately that no matter how much you tell a person the truth why can't they just take your word and believe you. Sometimes I find myself wondering why do I keep explaining myself when I say something and people just don't believe me. Should I even care what they think as long as I know the truth. I find that if you made a mistake in life people just don't let you live it down and it always comes back around and around. Well I'm getting to the point where I don't really care what people think anymore. I know what I'm doing and I'm staying true to myself and that's all that matters to me. I'm tired of trying to convince people and hey if they don't understand or trust me when I tell the truth, then from this point on that's their damn problem. If I tell you something then believe me not going to say it more than once again.  I'm gonna be Charles Sanders.......

Sittng Bored.

Here on another rotation for two weeks. Just sitting here bored out of my mind wondering why did I come back here. I really enjoy the area and being around some of the people here.  Then I thought about it again and realized that a person here really needed my help to develope him into a better person. He has gain some serious knowledge here over the last two weeks.  I feel good that he will go back to work now and do bigger and better things. So I guess it was a blessing to be here to share my knowledge, thoughts and ideas that I have learned over the years.  Just wished I could spend more time with others doing the same thing and teaching, showing and demonstrating for them what they will need to be better leaders in the near future because they will need it very soon.  Sometime learning on the spot can be overwhelming at times.  Being prepared it always best in my eyes but who am I to say.

How can anyone be this bad

How could someone make you feel so sick that you can't stand to be around them. There is a guy I work with and he just drives everyone crazy. No one wants to be around him and just about want to take him out. For three weeks now I have been dealing with him by myself so to speak since all the other staff took off on us for two weeks and on top of that I have to spend another two weeks with him. Well Friday night he had my head stressing so bad I could have taking him out myself. I know that he means well but I think he has ADA or some kinds of other ailment that takes over the brain. He really needs to be checked out to see if there is something truly wrong with him. I never seen someone who you tell over and over and he still just don't get it. I don't think he truly understands what it takes to do his job or any other job. How are we screening people these Days before hiring them. For two Days now I have cut him off I just can't even deal with him right now and wished he had stayed back. He has done a good job here this week so I wont take them from him. I know that he drives everyone crazy, but I can't even imagine if he drives his wife this crazy or how does she even stand it or deal with him. Maybe it is just me but I never had anyone stress me out like this before. I'm still pissed at the one these two weeks have turned out and I will tell you and anyone that this isn't funny being with him and for the person who actually set this up you will get yours in return one Day.

Losing my Mind

Over the last several months my life has changed dramatically and I don't know what direction that I'm going in. I seem to hurt everyone that I come in contact with. My mind just hasn't been the same and most times I find myself lost and confused. I know the best thing to do it put my faith in the man up stairs. But even then sometimes I just don't know and how to even really go about it. I know people say pray and I do but not like I should. So as of now I'm kind of stuck and lost, hurt and more confused than ever. I will keep my head up and try to make it on the best I can until I can figure things out or my Father will show me the way.

Needing Job

I guess in a month or so I will find out what it will be like to be homeless. Everyone seems to think that I have money cause I'm an E7 in the Army. Well everyone seems to forget I have bills as well. I'm paying for a house , truck , car and utilities for a home that I'm currently not living in. Also I'm paying rent , utilities for an apartment in another location. I have one month rent left and if I don't find a job soon I will be forced to live in my truck. But do you think people care. From my stand point everyone is out to get what they want or ask me for stuff I just can't provide. I'm not saying that this is bad on them but they need to realize that I can't even help myself right now how can I help someone else. I just don't know what to do I been looking for work but just like everyone else I'm filling out applications online and never get any feedback. If I had the money I would be more than happy to help whoever needs it.