Once again I come here to write stuff on my Blog Page on how I feel and again I don’t really know where to start ok but here it is. If I seem to being going back and fourth because of the thoughts always circling my mind. There are quit some issues with me these days and I don’t know what to do about it just yet. I feel like I’m in a world all by myself for the following reason. Number one I didn’t have to be here in Kuwait but no I had to listen to Soldiers saying SGT Sanders we need you to come back and go with us. Well to this day I think they people don’t care two cents about me for they don’t call me they don’t talk to me unless I go see then or they need something from me. The other bad part about some of them is that I work with them every day back in Tampa. I really thought we were close friends but that that feeling went out the door. There is one that Is suppose to be my Sister right but when I need her most she is never there for me or take care of what I really need help on. I will say this for her she does do a lot but not when it is really important to me. She is really like a Sister to me but I wished that she really had my back like she always say’s she does. There are more things I could say here but I will leave it alone for right now. There’s the second co worker I should say even though she just started there also wanted me to come back to go with them now either she really meant it of it was just a game to get me come back. She stated to me that if you don’t come back then I wont talk to you I’m like wow to myself. Now we are deployed over in Kuwait you think I hear from either of them think again. There are few others that wanted me to come back as well but these two really hit home with me since we work together every day. The other people I will say maybe just like having me around I guess I can’t really speak on that note. Some days I sit here and wonder why did I come when I could have been home with my family. Grand kids who want me around because they love me. I gave that up to come here with soldiers who don’t care one red cent about me how such a fool I been. I guess the last few days I have had too much time to think here that I really made a big mistake and coming back to Kuwait. I have more friends online then I do here or in real life but haven’t met any of them yet but they care about me more then my so call friends here or co workers. At least they check up on me all the time to see how I’m doing. Thank you guys for the ones who know who I’m talking about you will always be in my Heart. I know this will make some people mad with me but right now I don’t really give damn how they feel. Why should I do they care how I feel. I have asked them to hey just share a movie with me or even just go eat chow together. Well I to busy that’s what I get form them well so am I busy as well but I make time for my friend or wait I don’t have any. If there is a mission I go to work and come back to my room when I’m done that’s really my life here. Even on my days off I just sit in my room. I buy movies to past the time away. I have no one to hang out with or even talk with as a friend. I do have my room mate that I work with every day but we have our problems or issues that we go through. But the bottom line for me right now is that I’m always here for people and always trying to help people but I don’t feel they are here when I nee d them most. Who knows maybe my feelings are wrong at the moment but that’s just how I feel. Like I tell everyone I came here before because I know I had a purpose to be here to protect the soldiers now I don’t have that same feeling at least then I knew them and shared time getting to know them. I’m not asking anyone to give up their time or to get married lmao that’s a funny one all I need is for someone to check up on me from time to time since I do that for you. This is just part one of this statement part II to soon follow.
